Dear Gomer,
I never thought I would write about you,
A harlot, an idolator, one with a wicked hue,
They called you the wife of whoredoms, dressed in alluring blue,
Like a peacock’s feather, meant only to woo
Why did Hosea even marry you?
Why did a prophet of God say I do?
To a filthy woman who never knew,
The meaning of love or its value
Your name still brings disgust,
If Hosea was the iron, you were the rust,
All your mind had was only lust,
Still, Hosea tried to remove every dirt, every speck of dust
I am sure you thought at some point you would change,
Hosea asked for your hand, you found that strange,
‘Cos I am sure that it was beyond your mental range,
to even think of wearing a ring or be a part of that beautiful exchange
Why did you go back to your old ways?
After marriage, that too, in those early days
And then one day, you just left your husband,
To go back to harlotry, your marriage you had to end,
A bond with that man who tried so hard to mend,
That stone heart of yours so that no bad may impend
Thank you, Gomer for showing me that a woman can fall so low,
That she can be unstable, filthy and extremely shallow,
You drew the route map to the dead bottom where one can go,
A fancy cave of deceitfulness, with darkness and not a shadow
Thank you for also showing me that God’s love breaks through,
Every darkness, every dirt, every sin, every blue,
That all He cares about is finding you,
Despite your rags of filth, He gives value,
Why couldn’t you see that love so true?
A love so amazing and unconditional; I wish you knew.
Love,
The Wayward Woman
“Don’t hold onto things of the past—insecurity, paranoia, bitterness, low self-esteem and other synonymous burdens. It won’t do you any good. But God made marriage for this—to mellow you down,” said a super-spiritual Christian family friend of mine.
“Let your marriage help you drop your baggage!”—the exact verbatim she used.
Some things people say seem so right but are so wrong. Guilty of having most of the negative traits she pointed out, I decided to “drop” my baggage on my own. Surely, it wasn’t an easy process—definitely not like how you can leave your luggage behind on the conveyor belt and never bother to retrieve it or drop it at the collection counter before you enter a store. However, over the course of time, I have realised that it has a deeper meaning than how it is usually portrayed. And no, it cannot be just dropped anywhere.
Here is how I defined “emotional baggage”—a burden I thought I left behind but remnants of it, I still carry.
Gomer had a case full of emotional clutter. Most people thought marriage would declutter her life; remove the stains of harlotry, lust, and promiscuous relationships. But, it didn’t. The baggage was still with her. In accordance with my earlier definition, Gomer continued to use the clutter in her case to ruin Hosea’s life. While there is a lot of emphasis on Hosea’s character, Gomer is put in the bad light and her part of the story is sort of dismissed. The famous metaphor of God as a faithful husband to Israel as his adulterous wife is juxtaposed with the story of Hosea’s chaotic marriage to Gomer. Maybe, not to be taken literally, but as an allegory. Gomer is silent in Hosea 1—it makes many question the reason why there is not much about her domestic life with her famous husband. Her silence is proof that women were left out of discussions those times and how they were always vilified in stories.
While many try to learn from the life of Hosea, almost no one tries to even dissect Gomer’s story. Did she pray? Did Hosea and Gomer pray together? Did Hosea pray for Gomer? Has she had a lot of hurt in her life? Was she violated at a young age? Where does her promiscuous behaviour stem from? What are the pieces of clutter in her baggage? Did marriage help her declutter at least some parts of her baggage?
I don’t have answers to these questions but one thing I know is that clearing out your baggage is not through friendship or wedlock, it is solely through a relationship with Jesus. It is not an overnight process; it is a journey that takes time and effort. Getting married to a prophet or a pastor does not magically make your baggage light, neither does it clear out stains.
If only Gomer called out to God to help her lighten her burden, He would have gladly helped. And if she had decluttered her life, there would have been space for both God and Hosea.
That brings me to how my definition of emotional baggage is completely wrong. Shallow it is, and full of doubt. But God defines it differently, and correctly—a burden that has already been downsized to nil on the cross of Calvary.
This means—there should be no remnants of clutter for it has been trashed a long time ago.
Ah, the reassurance that we get on the cross. And through His Word—“For His yoke is easy and His burden is light (Mathew 11:30).” This promise is not just for women, it is also for men. Life would have been so much different for Gomer if only she did some decluttering. Why didn’t Hosea tell her about it?
Here’s a conversation that I imagined having with God:-
God: Here, let me carry it for you.
Me: No, it is mine to carry. It is heavy and I am responsible for it.
God: Let’s try to make it light, shall we? Let me see what is inside it.
Me: It is not pretty, God. I am ashamed of what I have hoarded over the years.
God: Let me try to help you lighten your load.
Me (ashamed, as I slowly unopen my bag): There is nothing that can be taken out.
Slowly and patiently, God unpacks my bag. All things that were cluttering the space in my heart—the place where only He should be dwelling. Prejudice, hypocrisy, idolatry, grudge, insecurity, lies—He picked them up, one by one.
God: Stop holding onto these. You don’t need them.
Me: Oh, but I do. I need them for my future battles; I don’t want to be hurt again.
God: Where is your faith? Don’t you think that I will fight for you?
Me: What if You won’t come to the rescue? I need something to fight with then, don’t I?
God: There will be pain, sorrows, and struggles, I never promised a life of comfort. But it is for a short period to accomplish a bigger purpose. Know that I am in control and the battle belongs to Me. I am your Defender, your Hope, Way, and your Redeemer.
And He empties my case completely.
Me: *a sigh of relief*
Now, there is space—for God, for His love, for His kindness, and for His grace.
Time to declutter and make room for things not of this world but things above.