“How are your children so well-behaved?”– lately, I have been hearing many comment on the good behavior of Judah and Sairah. Even some young people came up to me and said, “I am learning so much just by observing your kids!” Recently, during a homeschooling group meeting, a couple of mothers came and asked me, “What are you doing differently that your children behave so well?; they know how to treat other people and they are so attentive in class!” My heart was overjoyed hearing it but I had no answer to their question. I just usually nod my head and say, ‘thank you’ but this time, they wanted as elaborate answer. I said, “it is the grace of God!” but I knew it was an ambiguous reply.
That evening, when I got back home, I asked my husband about it, and he said, “It is because they know that we love them, and they equally fear us.” This got me thinking, so much that I just had to write about it. As children of God, wouldn’t it be nice that people around us send a good report to our Heavenly Father, telling Him that we are so well-behaved? This week in Scribbles and Confessions, we will look at the balance between the love of God and the fear of God.
The foundational truth of our relationship with God is love. Hence, there is a lot of emphasis on love. It is the love of God that compelled Him to send His only begotten Son to die for us, as often-quoted John 3:16 says. It is impossible for us to reciprocate the same love. However, the knowledge of this deep love for us makes it easy for us to love Him. Similarly, in the earthly parent-child relationships, the understanding of love that parents have for their children makes it easy for the children to love them back. 1 John 4:19 says, “We love Him, because He first loved us.”
There is an understanding of this unconditional love that God has for us which makes us not only love Him but also love ourselves better. Yes, we need to also love ourself! The Word of God says, “Love your neighbour as yourself!” So, how can we love our neighbour if we don’t love ourself? For us to truly love ourself, we need to understand deeply the love of Christ for us. Oftentimes, we get disappointed when we don’t see love in action from people around us. But we can always hold on the Jesus’ sacrifice, which is the biggest example of love in action.
Paul says in Ephesians 3: 17-19
I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Paul says that the more we grasp the love of Jesus, the more we will be filled with the fullness of God. It’s not just any “love” that we should be seeking – it’s not feelings, or being who we want to be – it’s Jesus’ love. His love is wider, longer, higher, and deeper than we know.
Now, let’s shift our focus to the fear of God. “God-fearing” or “Fear God!” are common phrases in a religious Christian household. Mostly used in the wrong connotation, this phrase often misused and misinterpreted. The fear of God is not worrying about being punished by God if we do something or do not. One of my favourite authors and Bible teachers, John Bevere once said, “the fear of the Lord is the fear of being away from the Lord or the fear of being away from His presence.” Some people say that God is love hence we do not need to fear Him– that is not how it works! Yes, God loves us and He is compassionate but our fear is not based on punishment, it is reverence. The word reverence means “deep respect”; we have deep respect for God and honour Him as our Father and for who He is as our Maker and Protector.
Psalm 25:14 says, “The secret of the LORD is with those who fear Him, And He will show them His covenant.”– this is one of my favourite verses. I have been meditating on this verse in the past couple of months to truly understand the fear of the Lord. And I have come to a state where I honour Him, and make sure I don’t hurt in a way that I would be drawn away from Him– I fear being away from His presence. This is exactly what our children have for us. Therefore, they behave the way they do. They know we love them, they love us back, so much that they are intentional about honouring us as parents through their behaviour towards us as well as others.
The fear of the Lord is the constant awareness of wanting to be in His presence. The understanding that sin or things that we do that displease God will take us away from His presence. So, I urge you to cultivate the fear of the Lord. The right knowledge of the fear of the Lord enables us to hate sin and anything that has to do with sin. It also calls out the hidden sins in ourself, stuck in the crevices of your heart. It brings about transformation.
The writer of Hebrews says in Hebrews12:28, “Since we are receiving a Kingdom that is unshakable, let us be thankful and please God by worshiping him with holy fear and awe.” Let us worship Him with holy fear and awe as we behave in a way that reflect our Father and His love for us.
Consider this:
As you go on a journey to learn the balance between love and fear, I would like to give you three pointers:
–Start with the Word of God: It is here that you need to start for the Word holds the truth about love and fear of the Lord. Sow your questions here and reap divine answers.
–Walk in the love of God: There are times when we can get disappointed in our journey, but remember to do everything in love. Be it discussions or conversations, reflect love–this is a remedy for all evil. Roadblocks and deterrents are inevitable in a journey, but know that the love of God is constant through it all.
–Remain in the presence of God: Like you read in the article this week, the fear of God is all about being in His presence and not being afraid. Always ask a question to yourself before engaging in an activity, “Does this please God?” Be intentional about not hurting God that you would drift away from His presence. And how do you know if you are in His presence, “go to the start–the Word of God”–in His presence, there is fullness of joy. The measure–joy!